we're getting ready to take strippers to breakfast. I love my life.
Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
I cut you off after you tried to do a shot out of a neti pot, down your nose.
explains the nose bleeds.
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
I got unbelievably drunk yesterday, need some time off. Apparently pulling your balls out to make your buddy's girlfriend miss beerpong shots is frowned upon.
8 stitches. Next time I decide to twerk while doing a keg stand, stop me.
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
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