can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
Can you please check on Jay? He just called and left a Backstreet Boys song on my voicemail. Either it's 1998, or someone needs to go back to rehab.
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
When I told her I was deaf and took my hearing aids out at night to sleep, she said it must be nice not having to hear drunken roommates having awkward sex late at night.
Randomize
