I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
I'm at the gas station where we got beef jerky and condoms. The fact that those two are in the same sentence makes me love you more.
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
My professor just gave us a margarita recipe.
Why?
Because, and I quote, he "wants to give us the tools to succeed in life."
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
I pour the whiskey from now on
Every time I download Tinder again, I hate myself a little more.
Randomize
