its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
News Flash: Turtles are cuter than Jesus.
Congrats on damning at least 10 generations of your offspring to hell with just one text message. Way to start your morning off right.
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
You have no idea the kind of bodily contortions I had to do to access your neighbor's WIFI
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
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