If I was doing exactly what I wanted right now I would be getting fucked on a jet ski while listening to "When Love Takes Over" by Kelly Rowland while eating french fries.
I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
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