one should ask oneself what kind of lifestyle one is leading when one finds a handprint of semen on their pillow the next day.
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
There's an old bald Japanese dude on the metra next to me. He's drinking MGD on a crowded train, and rocking out way too hard to what may be the same Dallas Green song I'm listening to. Life is sweet.
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
You totally left a blue butt print on our banister
Well I think we can all agree that that's better than then bowl of puke I left last time.
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
We have started to decorate penises.
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
Randomize
