his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
She posts like 3 statuses a day pleading for pity. Responding positively would be like giving a dog a treat for shitting on the floor.
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
I have just discovered the land of milk and honey. and by milk i mean vodka and by honey i mean tequila.
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