Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
Just woke up to find myself cooking eggs on the imaginary stove in my room.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
Randomize
