it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
Heard at work: Get out of my face before I cuntpunch you so hard your granddaughters have miscarriages. I love my job.
I'm moving there. Get me hired.
He just turned on a sound machine. I need to get the fuck out of here.
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
If you binge watch Bill Nye Saves the World without me you can consider yourself single
Let's get this straight. I am six fucking feet tall. Do you even understand how limited my options in guys to date are? No. Did you see my last three boyfriends? I looked like a fucking giant next to them. So I will fuck this six-foot-seven Italian model even if I am the ugliest girl at this party because, goddammit, I deserve to.
My orgasm happened in two different decades
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
Randomize
