love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
I told him that he was essentially a very life-like dildo with a person attached so he needed to stop having feelings because it was getting annoying. He agreed.
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
My boss just offered me a vodka mixed drink at work I do not have a real job
Randomize
