Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
I put my hydrocodone prescription in my cereal box its like real lucky charms
I can't feel my tongue. And that means go. Green means go. And you know what Barney says. Green means go and woah means no. DRIIIIINKK
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
like, is this a date?? I'm sitting on his couch drinking a juice box while he makes taquitos in sweat pants
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
Randomize
