I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
i just figured out how to balance my wine bottle on my boobs so that i don't have to tip it with my hands...breathing has new meaning
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
All I wanted to do was come home from work and masturbate for national sex day... I sliced my the tip of finger giving myself a pedicure so I can’t even do that #singlelife
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
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