is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
You're married and I'm going to make out with a stranger tonight. Isn't that weird? It's like a gap in the time space continium.
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
I was going to ask the people in the kitchen to keep the volume down, but they're cooking pasta at 3 AM and one complimented me on my polka-dot nightgown. They're high. No volume control.
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
Your life is a soap opera of great sex, cats, and booze.
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
Randomize
