And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
I heard you were drinking whiskey straight from the bottle last night.
Actually I was drinking whiskey straight from 3 bottles, but that is neither here nor there.
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
Apparently I drunkenly told him I was going to ride him to the rodeo and break him like a bronco, then I stole his nachos and beer. Adulting is hard!!!
Randomize
