I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
I was walking around the party holding a dog on my shoulder like it was a parrot
You can't just leave with hair like that
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
My boss's toddler just went through my bag and found your vibrator...you owe me a drink.
send nudes
from the living room?
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
Randomize
