I have demons in me.
she's about as cool as a sandpaper handjob.
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
Randomize