if you are receiving this text, you are one of the people i hate
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
Too drunk to talk to museum staff. So much for proper wednesdays
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
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