Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
You can't hide fat with big sunglasses.
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
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