I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
I am in the checkout line at the dollar store and there is a guy in front of me holding a pregnancy test, a chocolate bar, and fake roses. Champion.
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
Randomize
