If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
You asked me to be the big spoon, when you passed out on the stairs
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
The lady at Walgreens was all excited my pregnancy tests had a coupon.
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
Just got a blow job from a woman on a ski slope. She said ski'ing frightens her and giving head calms her down. Glad I could help ma'am!
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
Randomize
