Not sure what happened last night, but there are four mini bikes outside and some guy is wearing my shirt passed out in the breakfast nook. Won't be telling the grand kids about this one.
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
Should we go get some celebratory "I'm not pregnant" tacos?
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
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