I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
you want your laptop back?
are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?
both.
come over.
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
Good news, my sex bruises are fading. Bad news, my boobs look like I have a skin disease because of it.
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
Randomize