doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
Now would be a good time to set your alarm to pick me up from jail in the morning.
this morning i woke up under the kitchen table. i went to my room and there was an inflatable whale in my bed with a banana duct taped to where its penis should be. there were trails of cheez-its around my apartment and i found $67 in the crotch of my underwear. im guessing i had a very happy birthday.
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
I swear to god if you keep eating my cats food drunk I am going to kick you out of our apartment.
Welcome to my Tuesday when my lesbian ex girlfriend shows up unexpectedly and gets me drunk and then leaves
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
