YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
Is it bad that John just came to my work to have sex with me bc I felt bad that he slept on his porch last night locked out and I missed all his calls?
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
I was gonna drive but when i tried to use telekinesis to get my keys, I knew I shouldn't be driving
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
Randomize
