You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
the best part is my dad got arrested for the same thing at the same bar 30 years ago... so he cant be mad
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
Apparently she held up my head the entire 40 minutes, convincing the cab driver that I was okay
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
Randomize
