i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
I am intoxicated and cannot bring you a burrito. However, if you want to bring ME one...
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
That dude with the beard walked up to me, turned my water into wine with everclear and kool-aid, and walked away. Pretty sure drunk Jesus is back.
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
Randomize
