Nicole vs. Life
I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
You came in yelling "I'm el scorcho" and then axe can flamethrowered my dresser. Awesomeness aside, you owe me a new dresser.
Randomize
