ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
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Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
never play flip cup with pint glasses
How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
Thank you for leaving pool of vagina on my girlfriends carpet.
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
Randomize
