so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
There is a bottle of ciroc waiting graciously on my breakfast table. It's almost a sign for me to live up to my Russian blood.
I'm so high that I'm intently watching my neighbor move his car back and forth in order to put his motorcycle in the garage, and getting irritated that it seems so complicated.
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
Randomize
