Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
I feel like your standards for women is like rent-a-centers standards for credit.
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
Literally best acid trip ever. Better than sex. At one point she looked over at me, started crying, holds up her hands and said "dinosaur tears of sadness". Craziest roommate ever.
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
like, is this a date?? I'm sitting on his couch drinking a juice box while he makes taquitos in sweat pants
i just woke up from a 4 hour nap, still drunk, to make mac n cheese.
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