i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
At what point did I decide it would be a good idea to fill my contact case with vodka
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
accomplished twins. life is a go
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
Ultimate cock block. About to have sex and your mom calls you so you can go help your grandmother figure out how to vote for the voice on her iPad
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
Randomize
