dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
Hippo gnu deer
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
When she saw "buy condoms" on my to do list she figured out pretty quick we were breaking up.
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
Randomize
