i have the same doorman on the day shift as the guyi shacked with has on the night shift. he just laughed at me when i came home this AM. FML
I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
The chlamydia really affected his face.
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
What I'm doing now is like me taking a bagel, dropping it butter side down, leaving it for six years, picking it back up, and trying to fuck it
This week I fucked a police officer and called both the Senators from the state I'm in and the one I'm moving to. What have you done since the election?
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize
