This is not my ceiling
party started at 10. cops are coming to shut us down now and its 11. i already lostmy underwear and im wearing a sparkly thong on my haed. this has to be some kinda record.
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
Her stripper name is Geico. I'm not drunk or creative enough to make this up.
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
Randomize
