HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
I'm still mad from all the stupid shit he's done this week that even though I couldn't give two shits about Vday, I'm gonna throw an epic tantrum if he doesn't morph in to Nickolas Sparks for a day
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
Hey do you care to explain why there are 3 empty pickle jars next to me when I woke up or do I even wanna know?
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
Randomize
