my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
Randomize
