He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
Jesus I should have learned from my first marriage not to get married again
I'm going to have to include Angry Orchard in my thesis acknowledgements
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
I cut him off because he was changing my thermostat every time he came over
You made the right decision
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
Randomize
