problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
I'm relatively certain my chiropractor just judged me for admitting that my back is misaligned from the sex we had last night...
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
I am not old enough to be running into past fucks at the bank. This is at least a twenty five year old milestone.
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
I spent most of the night convinced it was my birthday. But I was probably wrong, it can't be January, can it? I'm 90% sure its not. But maybe. The days have got shorter. Is this what unemployment feels like to everyone?
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
It would have to be recorded, because that sex tape would be humanity's primary evidence of miracles
We should get Al Michaels to provide commentary for it.
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
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