Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
...Then she just started hitting me with a loaf of bread.
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
Ah, drunk me ordered sushi at 3 a.m. for sober me's lunch the next day. EXCELLENT
My dad just said "fuck circus"
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
Randomize
