good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
No, not at all. Pulling a condom out of your vag at 2pm is NOTHING like finding $10 in your winter coat. Stop trying to make me feel better.
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
I had to explain the gravity bong to my mom. Right after she pointed out I have a lot of dicks on my floor at any given moment.
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
Never let your siblings swipe right.
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
Randomize