Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
Just left some random in my bed to go get mcdonalds breakfast. I'd say my priorities are on point.
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
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