she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
I heard from the downstairs bathroom "WHY CAN'T I WIPE MY ASS IN PEACE!" and a pisscrate of glass bottles breaking
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
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