Whoa Z and x make the same sound
Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game.
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
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