To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
the only reason i even kissed her was because we were having sex when it midnight, and i heard people yelling "happy new year."
I'm like cupid
You're a whore with a bow and arrow
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
I think it's safe to say taking shots on the way to the emergency room was rock bottom. We're going to need to think of ways to top that between now and next new years eve...
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
Just found my glass of wine on top of the litter box. Every argument ever is invalid.
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
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