I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
Found a Safeway Deli Sandwich in the shower this morning... Perhaps the 9th beer was unnecessary.
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
First night sober since New Years. I'm not sure what hurts more, the hangover or the credit dread when I find out what the tickets to Bali actually cost.
But break dance skills will only take you so far
Hey you remember last Super Bowl when I sent you a pic of my testicles? Memories...
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
Netflix keeps asking me if I'm still watching just because I've been sitting here all afternoon...why do I feel like my tv is judging my life choices?
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
I’m literally watching say yes to the dress, eating fancy cheeses with crackers, and I have orange dark chocolates. All of which is being washed down with merlot. And I’m 100% sure a porno is gonna go down next door tonight. They don’t have a car and arrived via taxi. Happy holidays from motel 6 Pendleton Oregon!
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
Randomize
