You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
Finding an empty bathroom to shit on campus is like the quest for the fucking Holy Grail. Except with more stench and humiliation.
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
What's an appropriate engagement gift for the girl that's marrying your brother's Tuesday night hookup? Cause all I can think of is vodka and Kleenex.
you ass-dialed me while you were fucking my ex.
that was on purpose.
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
Randomize
