im six kinds of drunk right now
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
You were petting a 40 year old man's moustache for 15 minutes
the staff put glowsticks in the urinals of the porta-pottys last night and honestly drunk me has never been more grateful for anything in his life
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
I got here. Mom yelled "drink of the day is blueberry sangria" and next thing I knew I was on a slip and slide.
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