Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??
No seriously, I have to sell the house because my wife found out I'm gay.
just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
broke, out of weed, out of gas, out of food, and my gf just left me.
you're writing country songs now?
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
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