it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
he's measuring my pool to see how much jello powder he needs. He got paid today.
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
Friends don't let friends put redi whip in their wine
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
Randomize
