oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
We left the window open. My vibrators funeral is at 2ish.....bring a side dish or some shit.
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
She just started grabbing all the hospital's rubber gloves and face masks and shoving them in her purse, saying, "My tax money paid for these!"
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
What the fuck dude? Now it's a "who is this?" convo going back and forth. Like... helllloooo you just sent me a picture of your penis! I'm entitled to ask who the fuck it is. I can't verify an identity by a body part.
Randomize
